Summer vacation is a sinkhole of hopes. You go in thinking, Now that I have free time, I'l get everything done. But, of course, you know that in your heart of hearts you know, you don't want to do anything. This is vacation, and if you don't indulge your laziness now, you never well. So, you start putting things off, getting much needed relaxation. Midway through, you begin to think of getting something done. But "everything" overwhelms you and you procrastinate, until it's fall again and time to get back to work.
And that's how my summers go. My biggest accomplishment was reading 10 novels, getting my first novel ready for the agents, and brainstorming. It's not exactly the "everything" I was supposed to get done. Part of me is ready for fall to come, so I can shake off my apathy and go back to being my productive self. Unfortunately, that part of me has also gotten used to sleeping in to 9:00. 5:00 AM wake ups aren't going to be fun.
The last weeks of August are filled with trepidition. I have always been nervous about the first week of school. It doesn't matter that I'm no longer a student. It feels like starting over. Add to the fact that I'll be submiting to agents and I feel guilty for all the work I didn't get done, and this week has been filled with anxiety. And what do I do to combat that anxiety? I procrastinate.
I know! I know! I have these dreams, these imaginings of writing every day and getting things done! (Sigh!) And I've got plenty of time now too! Discipline! Wherefore art thou? d:)
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